Category: Dating & Singleness

Rob Bell and Oprah aside, marriage wasn’t designed to solve loneliness

In a recent appearance on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday to promote his latest book, The Zimzum of Love,  Rob Bell made remarks on marriage that are causing consternation among some and receiving applause from others. In the interview, the Pastor Emeritus of Mars Hill Bible Church expressed his sentiments that the church is “moments away” from affirming same-sex marriage, following the broader…  [more]

“Missed connections” and a love worth pursuing

As Valentine’s Day approaches, we find ourselves in a season of American life with competing paradigms of romantic love. From films, music and even the card aisle of your local pharmacy, February is always a month dedicated to the exploration of one of our most mysterious of virtues. In the spirit of exploration, I want to present two tales, which represent two vastly different views of love in the modern…  [more]

Cohabitation, ‘conscious uncoupling’ and Christian marriage

A recent study has shed new light on the issue of cohabitation, suggesting it’s no longer a predictor of divorce. Meanwhile, after 10 years of marriage, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have announced their decision to “consciously uncouple.” What are we to make of these news items in light of a Christian understanding of marriage? Past research has shown that living together before marriage is…  [more]

What science gets right - and wrong - about love

In an Atlantic piece provocatively titled “There’s No Such Thing as Everlasting Love (According to Science),” researcher Barbara Fredrickson is cited as suggesting that love is neither a “long-lasting, continually present emotion that sustains a marriage” nor “the yearning and passion that characterizes young love.” Instead, it is what Fredrickson calls a…  [more]

Meeting singleness with sorrow and grace

As I reflect on romance, marriage and the future, I find myself camping out somewhere between grace and sorrow. Sometimes grace is more prevalent than sorrow; other times, sorrow is more prevalent than grace. I'm not without normal human emotions, thoughts and feelings just because I have a physical disability that people see when they look at me. Please don't ask if I'm content in my singleness.…  [more]

Valentine’s Day dinner deals and true romance

While dining at a local Italian restaurant with my 10-year-old daughter, she read an ad for an upcoming Valentine’s Day special, which sounded like serious romance to her. “You and Dad should come here for that,” she sagely advised. I told her that we didn’t usually do a lot for Valentine’s Day. “Dad’s not really the romantic type. Flowers and valentines are not his…  [more]

Rules, purity and the wilderness of sexuality

Editor's note: This is excerpted from Amy Frykholm's new book, "See Me Naked: Stories of Sexual Exile in American Christianity." Christians love to give each other advice on sexuality. If you wander into any Christian bookstore or peruse Christian magazines, you’ll find lots of such advice. Likewise, the Internet is full of ministries dedicated to the subject of sexuality, all intended as guides. On The Marriage…  [more]

Serving single women in Mexico

For Martha, a single mother living in Mexico, life is not easy. Her husband left her two years ago. Now she works six days a week to provide for herself and her teenage daughter. Martha (whose named has been changed to provide anonymity) leaves early in the morning and comes home around 6 or 7 p.m. each night. The stress of life is visible on her and her daughter; they both struggle with anxiety and other…  [more]

Finding a place for single pastors

Is it harder to get a job as a Christian pastor if you're single? A recent New York Times article exploring this topic has created quite a response in the Christian community, with some saying that pastoral search committees should be marriage-minded and others saying just the opposite. Is this a type of “singlism” coming to light or simply anecdotal evidence of a few pastoral job seekers having a tough time in…  [more]

How “The Bachelor” shapes our cultural view of love

“I came here looking for love.” That’s the sentence I’ve come accustomed to hearing each week after the latest woman is eliminated from "The Bachelor." Like many men across the country, I’ve found myself involved in the drama of this reality dating show thanks to the fact that my wife watches it. While it began as simply background noise for me, I’ve now become interested in the details and stressed…  [more]

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